Touched by Angels
Being an extrovert, going on a silent retreat was a relatively daunting task, as there was a part of me that craved interactions and activities.
Sitting still was a challenge for me.
On top of that, being in silence and disconnecting from the very noisy world we live in coupled with sitting with my own thoughts were pretty intense.
So prepped with my fitness gear, an exercise regime and several spiritual books, I embarked on a seven-day overseas silent retreat in November 2022, a retreat that I had been long awaiting since the past year.
“All set and ready, here I come Jesus”, I thought to myself.

Pathway to Accommodation
The First Morning
On my first morning, I eagerly got up bright and early to run! 30 minutes into it, my left ankle started to hurt. It wasn’t a fall or a sprain, but the pain lingered. Bewildered and distraught, I limped my way back to the retreat centre wondering how it all happened.
I had no answer to the hurting ankle though I knew I had to remedy it quickly. I went to the nearby pharmacy and got an ankle guard, ankle wrap, and an ice pack. The pharmacist also left me with strict advice to limit my walking and to apply the ‘RICE’ method (Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation) on my left ankle.
“There goes all the plans! What’s gonna happen in the next six days?”, I thought.
Overwhelmed, I prayed for the pain to go away soonest. I was saddened at the thought of not being able to exercise nor take long walks during this retreat. Comforting myself, I ditched the fitness plans and did short walks around the retreat centre.

Meditations
As time went on, the pain increased. The swell enlarged. The limp became a hobble. That night, an excruciating pain shot from my ankle to my thighs and woke me in the wee hours where I found myself unable to bear any weight on my left foot.
“Never have I felt so alone, never have I been so desperate for help, only to forget so quickly that God will never forsake me.”
Helpless and Fearful
I crumbled! I lost count on the number of times I sobbed helplessly in fear wondering what to do next and how to help myself over the simplest tasks like standing up from my bed, getting myself to the bathroom, rummaging for Panadol, and even getting food and drinks from the pantry a few doors down the corridor. An umbrella accompanied me through each task as I inched my way around dragging my leg.
The next morning, the pain continued to persist, the swelling got worse. I was distressed and utterly helpless. My frustrations grew. I was devastated that I had sustained an injury on a retreat that I’ve waited so long for.
Never have I felt so alone. Never have I been so desperate for help. Then I remembered that God will never forsake me especially since I was on a retreat intentionally wanting to seek Him.


Swollen ankle with walking aid
Seeking His Graces
On the same day, I brought myself to the hospital. It was suspected that my injury seemed more severe.
Crutches were given to me. And it was at this moment that I was baffled at how my retreat was unfolding. Pondering on the words of Jesus, I cried,

The same words Jesus called out to his Father in his dying moments rang out to me as I sat in the foreign hospital feeling totally weak and powerless. I could no longer do this alone.
The uncertainty of completing the retreat and needless to say, much skepticism of traveling home hopping on crutches through transit flights had all seemed so impossible. My usual strong front began to crumble, I realised how weak and vulnerable I was.

Banana cake gifted by Spiritual Director (SD)
As I awaited my appointment, I grew hungry. Feeling pathetic, I thought to myself that it would be impossible to get food in this unfamiliar place. Then, I recalled my Spiritual Director left me with a loaf of banana cake to eat along the way.
“Thank goodness for this cake!”, I thought.
As I nibbled on the cake, I was sad that my precious time with Jesus had been compromised. I honestly felt that God had abandoned me after tremendous efforts of setting aside this time with Him.
“If only I could allow You to be the driver
in this retreat while I take the back seat.”
“Oh Father, come to my desperate aid!”
A Realisation
It suddenly dawned on me how God was present through the gift of the cake and the efficiency and professionalism of the first class medical care provided to me in a foreign hospital.
Being conscious of God’s presence, I saw the face of Jesus through the many staff I encountered: porters, nurses, radiologists, physiotherapists, doctors, admin workers, even the cab drivers too. Jesus was EVERYWHERE! Through their smile, their compassionate care. It all made me feel safe and taken care of!

With hospital wheelchair porter

Injury Not a ‘Coincidence’
In one of my sessions with my Spiritual Director, he shared that this curveball in my retreat was not a coincidence and perhaps God had something more to say to me so I was advised to ponder deeper into the meaning of this injury.

The 200-metre hobble
After returning to the retreat centre, I felt like I had completed a 10km run even though I hobbled for a mere 200 metres.
The new found joy had all but diminished. The weight of my injury dawned on me and it felt like I had an uphill task ahead. “With both hands on my crutches, how do I fulfil my daily duties, like simply grabbing water from the cooler or making a cup of coffee?”
But… there was only one thing that came to my mind!
“Now that I’m back at the retreat centre, let’s continue the retreat and contemplate on this injury.”
Evening came, I arrived extremely early for Mass and sat in the chapel silently.
After Mass, the silence broke and several reached out to me. These retreatants were concerned when they saw me on crutches.
One of them shared, “Moving forward, please bang on my door if you need anything. Just bang till I get up.”
I felt consoled! I felt safe that I’m back in a good place where I could count on someone if I needed help again.
Humbled by His Love
With my limited mobility, my kind neighbours encouraged me to reach out for help. Yet, my independent-self disliked the idea of troubling others. It was a great struggle accepting help from others even if they genuinely wanted to.
However, I was taken aback when my neighbour shared, “It is a joy to serve!”
A Revelation
There was something about that phrase that moved me and got me pondering. For I never once considered that I could be an instrument to allow another to experience Jesus through the act of helping me. Though more importantly, needing ‘help’ also allowed me to experience the love of God through others.
It was comforting to realise that this injury revealed certain things that I was previously unaware of. To come to accept that I’m incapable of relying on my own strength, but through an open heart did God’s outpouring love and mercy filled me overwhelmingly. By accepting help, I accepted love! I accepted that God truly loves me and wants to love me, and all I had to do was say “Yes!”
Be Still and Know
The concluding days of my retreat were spent in the stillness and silence of my room. Each load was lightened with the help of someone that would come my way. My worries were taken care of.


Coffee by neighbour. Little joys!
With peace of mind and heart, I could be still and pray. I knew that God had a completely different plan for my retreat.
The pain in my ankle had subsided just enough for me to get home on both feet with minimal assistance from the crutches.

Michelle with her kind neighbours and SD (extreme left)
I am grateful for the many angels sent along my way through my time in the retreat centre and in the hospital. I am thankful for the new friendships forged too.
Thanks be to God!
Michelle Sandra
Read Michelle’s Lenten Reflection here: ‘70 Days in the Wilderness’.
Stories in the COTTyard
Encountering God | Sharing Stories | Spreading Love
Write in to us @ [email protected]
Pingback: 70 Days in the Wilderness | Michelle Sandra
Pingback: does tadalafil expire
Pingback: college essay writing service
Pingback: cheap law essay writing service
Pingback: can someone write my essay
Pingback: help in writing an essay
Pingback: custom essays writing service
Pingback: personal essay help
Pingback: best custom essay service
Pingback: write my college essay me
Pingback: can i buy viagra at a pharmacy
Pingback: cialis online without
Pingback: viagra gel tabs
Pingback: buy cialis in cro
Pingback: how to buy viagra online in india
Pingback: does bactrim treat strep
Pingback: flomax alternative drugs
Pingback: diltiazem hcl er 180 mg
Pingback: semaglutide queens ny
Pingback: remeron weight gain avoid
Pingback: how long does it take for effexor to get out of your system
Pingback: risperidone vs abilify
Pingback: how much robaxin can i take at once
Pingback: protonix alcohol
Pingback: amitriptyline high
Pingback: lipitor vs ezetimibe
Pingback: acarbose abnehmen
Pingback: repaglinide physicochemical properties
Pingback: actos help
Pingback: venlafaxine ptsd
Pingback: generic for voltaren gel
Pingback: tizanidine is it a narcotic
Pingback: synthroid trazodone
Pingback: spironolactone hormone
Pingback: effects of tamsulosin
Pingback: stromectol tab price
Pingback: dapagliflozin sitagliptin and metformin hydrochloride uses in hindi
Pingback: us online pharmacy cialis
Pingback: order levitra women
Pingback: order levitra online
Pingback: ivermectin oral solution
Pingback: maxim peptide tadalafil
Pingback: where to buy ivermectin
Pingback: order viagra online without a prescription
Pingback: auvitra vardenafil tablets
Pingback: ivermectin price uk
Pingback: buy ivermectin stromectol
Pingback: what possible side effect should a patient taking tadalafil report to a physician quizlet
Pingback: ivermectin uk buy
Pingback: animal porn
Pingback: animal porn
Pingback: ananın amı
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: what is amoxicillin and clavulanate potassium used for
Pingback: ciprofloxacin and alcohol reddit
Pingback: can i take 3000 mg of metformin a day
Pingback: porn
Pingback: can you drink while taking valacyclovir
Pingback: is cephalexin an antibiotic
Pingback: how to get free samples of provigil
Pingback: doxycycline price
Pingback: pregabalin 25 mg capsule
Pingback: trazodone brand name
Pingback: Cocuk pornosu
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: sex
Pingback: porn
Pingback: sex historie
Pingback: hardcore porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: sex
Pingback: spam
Pingback: porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: meritking
Pingback: meritking
Pingback: meritking
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: spam
Pingback: track location by phone number
Pingback: Konya Seo Uzmanı
Pingback: buy instagram followers
Pingback: web tasarım fiyatları
Pingback: football skills
Pingback: cristiano ronaldo skills
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: porn
Pingback: viagra otc
Pingback: para que sirve vardenafil
Pingback: buy generic levitra 10 mg
Pingback: tadalafil vs sildenafil
Pingback: xenical malaysia pharmacy
Pingback: can you drink alcohol with sildenafil
Pingback: how many 20 mg sildenafil should i take
Pingback: sildenafil 50 mg para que sirve
Pingback: how much sildenafil can you take
Pingback: sildenafil premature ejaculation
Pingback: viagra cialis levitra online
Pingback: brand levitra online
Pingback: vidalista tadalafil
Pingback: levitra pills cheap
Pingback: oxycodone international pharmacy
Pingback: sildenafil 50mg tablets
Pingback: tylenol scholarship pharmacy
Pingback: levitra online price
Pingback: tadalafil powder
Pingback: levitra tablets online
Pingback: is it ok to take 100mg of sildenafil
Pingback: pharmacy customer care viagra
Pingback: escrow pharmacy online
Pingback: sildenafil citrate 200mg
Pingback: how much is vicodin at pharmacy
Pingback: vardenafil vs sildenafil dosage
Pingback: does cialis keep you from ejaculating
Pingback: tadalafil trade name
Pingback: oxycodone prices pharmacy
Pingback: rx pharmacy generic viagra
Pingback: porn
Pingback: online pharmacy generic valtrex
Pingback: best cialis online pharmacy
Pingback: tadalafil vs sildenafil dosage
Pingback: tadalafil interactions with alcohol
Pingback: tadalafil 20 mg used for
Pingback: indian pharmacy online
Pingback: tadalafil premature ejaculation
Pingback: snovitra 20 mg vardenafil
Pingback: celebrex in the usa
Pingback: carbamazepine and lorazepam
Pingback: pain medicine tegretol
Pingback: can u take motrin with amoxicillin
Pingback: does etodolac thin blood
Pingback: sulfasalazine side effects alcohol
Pingback: will ibuprofen help gallstone pain
Pingback: gabapentin lawsuit
Pingback: obat celebrex celecoxib
Pingback: diclofenac sodium and misoprostol
Pingback: gout medicine indomethacin side effects
Pingback: is amitriptyline an ssri
Pingback: how long should you take baclofen
Pingback: what kind of pill is mobic
Pingback: purchase sumatriptan online
Pingback: imuran squamous cell
Pingback: azathioprine dose for dogs
Pingback: can you get generic toradol without rx
Pingback: clonazepam tizanidine
Pingback: can i get generic ketorolac no prescription
Pingback: mr chans takeaway artane
Pingback: periactin appetite stimulant for kids
Pingback: can you snort a zanaflex
Pingback: cyproheptadine hydrochloride for cats
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: ananızı sıkecem
Pingback: porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: child porn
Pingback: madride anti kasma ananı sıkerım